Beer Steak Bullshit

Accused Craigslist Killer Philip Markoff and his fiancee Megan McAllister had a wedding scheduled for August 14, 2009. They even had their own, dedicated wedding website that was located at megan-philip.com but was since taken down and now merely displays a parked page. It’s gonna earn lots of money though, cause blogosphere will send crap loads of traffic to it today. Perhaps then Philip Markoff will not have to kill hookers from Craigslist in hotels. Perhaps he’ll be able to use the money from the traffic his parking revenue will generate. But let’s get back to Philip Markoff’s wedding to Megan McAllister and their original wedding website – you can’t cheat bloggers, Philip Markoff. We got screenshots!

The website told the whole story how Philip Markoff met Megan McAllister back when they both attended University of Albany, how their building were right next door to each other, how they started volunteering at the hospital and playing with urine samples – I made the playing part up. The website did mention urine sample, but doesn’t mention golden shower sex play. They didn’t disclose much detail from their sex life. It does say their first date was on November 11 2005, what it doesn’t say is when they had their first sex. My guess is before first date. At that time Megan McAllister would have been an anal sex virgin – my guess.

The wedding website also provided the link to where guests could book a room at the Jersey Shore for only $155 – newbs. Don’t they know we’re in recession, vacation industry, in particular US hotels are going through extreme hardship and nobody charges $155 per night anymore? Freaking newbs. Don’t they ever read my blog? It would give them an idea on how to go about booking your freaking vacations!

Anyway – I’m not gonna elaborate on Philip Markoff and Megan McAllister wedding website too much. Check out the screenshots if you are interested in how a mind of a Craigslist killer and his prostitute works. Guestbook is the most precious part. Before they were able to take the site down, some people left them their wishes and gems include the following line:

I have a question about the hotel you guys are holding the wedding in… has the grrom killed anyone there yet?

How does Megan McAllister feel about sucking on the cock of Craigslist Killer and taking it in the ass afterwards? She looks like she was tossing his salad too and he took great pleasure in that. What a loving couple. I can imagine Philip Markoff was taking ass licking from Megan McAllister with his eyes closed, while he envisioned a filthy hooker from New York, tied up in a hotel with scared look on her face while he’s flashing a hand gun at her face. Cumshot!

Gallery of photos containing screenshots of Philip Markoff and Megan McAllister wedding website is below:

22 year old Philip Markoff has been in police custody since Monday, April 20, 2009. He’s suspected to be one of the most dangerous predators many have come to know as Craigslist Killer. Philip Markoff is a bright, clean cut medical student at the Boston University. But as it happens with most notorious killers – it’s always the nicest guys who commit the most atrocious crimes. Friends, family, neighbors – everyone is surprised when the police come and lead the man away in handcuffs… How could this happen, he was the nicest guy on the block. Well, surprise – it’s always the nicest guy on the block. And if Philip Markoff is proven guilty, if Philip Markoff is truly a Craigslist Killer, then it means that this bright kid who’s about to become a doctor and have a wedding to Megan McAllister has a blood of 26 year old Julissa Brisman on his hands.

Philip Markoff has been accused of murdering Julissa Brisman – a masseuse (masseuse is more often than not a Craigslist code language for “escort”) who advertised her services on Craigslist and of the robbery of another two females who also advertised her services on Craigslist. Both robberies as well as murder of Julissa Brisman were carried out in a hotel room. Because all the victims were picked on and contacted via popular classified site Craigslist, the murderer became known as the Craigslist Killer.

Philip Markoff Profile

Philip Haynes Markoff comes from the state of New York, but has lived in Quincy, a town south of Boston, Massachussets. It is believed Philip Markoff graduated of the State University of New York-Albany in 2007 and is currently studying second year medicine at Boston University, set to graduate in 2011. After school learned about the murder charges against Philip Markoff, he was suspended from the medical program. His wedding to Megan McAllister was scheduled for August 14, 2009 – I don’t think it’s taking place anymore.

Craigslist Killer

Craigslist Killer (possibly Philip Markoff) made contact with women who offered services such as “private massages” or “private dances” on Craigslist. He would arrange a meeting in a hotel, but when a girl arrived, she was tied up at gun point and robbed. Two of the victims took the abuse and were only robbed. One of them, however tried to escape. 26-year-old Julissa Brisman wasn’t having any of that and tried to make a run for it. Unfortunately, Craigslist Killer wasn’t having any of that escaping and shot her several times.

Julissa Brisman was an aspiring actress (all hookers are, aren’t they?). She was found bleeding and in cardiac arrest on the 20th floor of Marriott Copley Place in Boston. Despite attempts of medic to revive her, she died shortly after.

The police reviews videos from hotel surveillance cameras (photo of a screenshot is above) and each of the assaults related to girls offering services on Craigslist were carried out by what appeared to be the same blonde male with a blackberry. The police believed all of these were done by the same man whom they dubbed Craigslist Killer. And now, with help of millions of bloggers the suspects were narrowed down to one man – Philip Markoff.

According to Suffolk District Attorney Daniel Conley and Boston Police Commissioner Edward Davis, Philip Markoff has been charged with murder, unlawful possession of a firearm, armed robbery and kidnapping. Check out the video below:

WARNING – if you live within North America, don’t watch the video. You will find it offensive. You’ll probably end up suing somebody. Oh, the outrage! Naked male bums on national TV. How dare they in Sweden? Off with their heads! Seriously…

All right. Remember the Janet Jackson Wardrobe Malfunction during Super Bowl half time break in 2004? Yeah, Justin Timberlake grabbed at Janet Jackson’s dress right over her tit and yanked ripping the tit cover off, exposing the boob which had nipple and areola covered with some ornament. It cause so much controversy morons at high places would not shut their stupid mugs about it for half a decade now. The way real time broadcasting in North America works had to be reprogrammed so we don’t expose innocent, vulnerable… someone (I don’t even know who) to the dangers of seeing half naked sagged boob. What ridiculousness.

The above is in North America, though. In Europe, they’re not as ass tight and everything works fine. The Swedish rendition of Sweden’s Got Talent featured a quartet of twinks whose act was a dance. Only they were dancing naked. Yep, four naked twinks on national TV in Sweden performing their dance. Granted, their moves were done in such way so as to cover their private parts, however they were wearing no clothes and their asses were in clear view of spectators and cameras at all times.

Imagine this would happen in North America. Janet Jackson would be put to shame with her lame attempt at destroying our purity. The whole shit country would get sued, heads would be falling, businesses would be shutting down, religious prudes would start nationwide sessions to cleanse the sheep off the sin – the entire continent would explode.

Now look what they do in Sweden – judges give performers standing ovations, audience shocked, but loving it – not because they see nudity, but because they see four twinks with balls the size of a Keiko whale. Even though these twinks weren’t that greatly rehearsed, they were given props by everyone for entertaining the crowd and bringing something new on the stage of Sweden’s Got Talent. Sweet old Europe!

Just when you thought Miss USA could not get any worse, the title was given to perhaps the most plastic looking, overused blonde by the name of Kristen Dalton. Donald Trump has awful taste in women. Have they seriously run out of pretty girls or does Donald Trump purposefully request plastic looking, Playboy style Barbie doll blondes without charisma?

Kristen Dalton who won Miss North Carolina pageant represented her state at Miss USA 2009 and won the contest. Miss West Virginia Jessi Pierson won herself the Miss Photogenic title and Miss Congeniality award was won by Miss Wyoming Cynthia Pate. Miss California Carrie Prejean ended as first runner up and second runner up was Miss Arizona Alicia-Monique Blanco. The Miss USA 2009 was held at the Planet Hollywood Resort Casino in Las Vegas and was broadcast live nationally on NBC.

Miss North Carolina turned Miss USA 2009 Kristen Dalton is a 22 year old Wilmington native with family history of Miss pageants. The Miss North Carolina title was won by her mother in 1982 and her sister won Miss North Carolina Teen USA 2008. Kristen Dalton also contested in Miss North Carolina Teen USA in 2005 and was first runner up back then.

Having won Miss USA 2009, Kristen Dalton will go to represent her country in the Miss Universe pageant. Here’s hoping Kristen Dalton will continue with hilarious tradition of Miss USA at Miss Universe and will fall on her ass like her two predecessors Miss USA 2007 Rachel Smith and Miss USA 2008 Crystle Stewart. Perhaps being from North Carolina, she could outdo her South Carolina counterpart and be both dumb and fall on her ass.

Gallery of pictures from Miss USA 2009 pageant with newly crowned Miss Kristen Dalton is below.

Photos by Judy Eddy, WENN.com

There was recently a case from New Jersey where a man posing as a waiter collected $186 from people who came to dine at two locals restaurants. According to victims, the bogus waiter looked to be about 20 year old with spiky hair. He was wearing a dark blue shirt with yellow tie and khaki pants. This is how it went down:

Bogus waiter sat in the restaurant and observed diners. He paid attention especially once diners were done and asked for a bill. Real waitress would bring the bill and he would keep a keen eye on which diners start putting actual cash together with which to pay for the bill. Once they appeared to have the cash handy, he’d approached them acting as though he was a chief waiter and asked them if they wished for anything else before paying. Diners said they were OK and handed him the cash. There are two reported cases in New Jersey alone. The first one happened in Hobson’s Choice in Hoboken, N.J where diners got scammed out of $90, the second one took place in Margherita’s Pizza and Cafe – three women there got scammed out of $96. There are likely more, undocumented cases or cases the police did not have reports finished on yet. Either way – someone realized that people who dine in restaurants generally trust waiters with their money and credit cards while frequently failing to make sure they are handing it to the right person.

Now check out the video above. That one is from England and bogus waiter there takes advantage of people who opt to sit outside on patios in nice weather. Bogus waiter would approach them as soon as they are seated, often times making themselves look like an actual waiter by either wiping off their table and handing over the menu which he picked up from another table. He used a hard to resist line that people who sit outside must leave their credit cards with the establishment as there have been many cases of people ordering drinks and leaving without paying. A line like that simply implies that you are suspected of being a potential thief which is what no honest person wants. This makes them really want to hand over their credit cards to make sure they look like honest buyers with sincere intentions to pay for their order.

Little do they know that they just handed their credit card to a bogus waiter. It’s cool how calm Brits are. Even after they find out they were just robbed off their credit cards, they keep it cool and get concerned with minimalistic reasons. If that was filmed in North America, we’d be watching screaming women freaking out, raising hell, suing the establishment and stabbing nearby kittens in the eye with their newly pedicured nails. Luckily for all credit card holders, their cards come with some form of protection so if their cards get stolen like that and abused right away, their credit card company would swallow the cost of unauthorized purchases. That’s what you pay for when you pay your annual credit card fees – they call it credit card/fraud protection or something like that.

Morale of the story – always make sure you know whom you’re handing your money/credit cards to. Wait until you are served drinks or food and pay to the same person who served you. Or stand up, walk to the cash register, tell them which table you were at and ask them to tell you the total which you want to pay for. We will probably see more bogus waiters popping out as the economic crisis deepens. Sadly, there will always be individuals too lazy or too worthless to earn their living by contributing to the society with their work. They will prefer stealing from others, especially since some settings make people more trusting. Don’t allow them to exploit you. Be a smart player, look after yourself. It’s always worth it!

Russian people are hilarious. They are the most violent and most honor-lacking, but girls are hot and based on a small sample of what I have had the privilege of meeting, they give great blowjobs. But let’s not go there. Yet! This hilarious video is from Russia as well. The police had stopped a car the driver of which appeared intoxicated, so they asked him to step out of the vehicle and submit to the breathalyzer test. Visibly drank grandpa agrees to take on the test and that’s where he fails in such hilarious way I’d never imagine.

When you’re so drunk that you grab at the breathalyzer and try to take sip of more booze from it, then you’re really effin drunk. The laughter that one of the police makes only adds to the whole awesomeness of the video. Gradpa smiles himself cause he thinks they pulled a joke on him by tricking him into drinking from an empty bottle. The fail in this case is truly epic. Instead of blowing into the breathalyzer, he went to drink from it. Does it get any better than that?

It might be different in Russia, but I know in Canada DUI lawyers make ridiculous amount of money exploiting holes in the drinking and driving law. However with video evidence like that, I don’t see how they could possibly make any case. Bye, bye drivers license

The story of 9 year old Amber Hagerman who was kidnapped as she was riding a bicycle and subsequently murdered prompted the introduction of Amber Alert – the missing children system which sends out a bulleting each time there is a suspicion a child has been abducted.

Amber Hagerman Story

When Amber Hagerman was 9 year old, she was at her grandma’s in Arlington, Texas and went for a bike ride. It was January 13, 1996 – Jimmie Kevil, the neighbor of Amber’s grandma heard little girl scream. As he ran outside to find out what was going on, he saw a man in black pick up truck pull Amber Hagerman off her bike and stuff her inside the vehicle. Seconds later, he drove away at high speed.

Jimmie Kevil immediately alerted the police and provided description of the abductor and the car. Arlington police launched search for the car and were followed by countless volunteers and FBI. Local media, including TV and radio stations covered the Amber Hagerman story with hopes it would help recover the 9 year old girl but it was all in vain. 4 days from her abduction, Amber Hagerman was found dead in a drainage ditch only four miles from where she was kidnapped. Her abduction and murder remain unresolved, however the police are looking into files of Terapon Adhahn, who’s a person of interest in the case of Amber Hagerman.

Amber Alert

Amber Alert system for missing children was originally implemented in the USA and was inspired by the kidnapping and murder of Amber Hagerman. The system was later adopted by Canada, UK and other countries. Amber Alert is based on a similar principle weather alerts work – where mainstream media player receive an alert of some upcoming weather condition and pass it on immediately.

In order to avoid false alarms, certain conditions must be met to issue Amber Alert:

• A Case must be filed with the law enforcement
• A child must be at serious risk
• There must be description of a child, an abductor, and their car
• Only children up to 17 years of age can have an Amber Alert issued

Once there is a reason to issue Amber Alert, the bulletin is immediately dispatched to commercial radio and TV stations, satellite and cable providers, further Amber Alerts are sent via e-mail and to the LED billboard signs such as the one located in the example below. This is what Amber Alert looks like in action:

While success rate of Amber Alert system is questionable, it is without doubt a way to get more eyes involved in looking for missing children. The loss of 9 year old Amber Hagerman was truly a horrible tragedy, but perhaps her story will help prevent murders of some other children.

Remember Miranda Tozier-Robbins from American Idol season 5? Yeah, me neither. Well, the 26 year old ex American Idol contestants went crazy when she decided to stalk Britney Spears at her private residence in Calabasas. Security personnel guarding the property of Britney Spears noticed a camouflage wearing person creeping around the windows to the residence, went to check out on the situation and found Miranda Tozier-Robbins taking peeks inside, while carrying a backpack with a video camera inside. That must be the most boring celebrity stalker story ever. I thought stalker are more creative – you know, like they get in the house through the chimney, pack themselves up in a cupboard and quietly jerk off snooping at them through tiny gap. 21st century stalkers suck.

According to reports, when security people told Miranda Tozier-Robbins to leave as she was on a private property and could be charged with trespassing, she disregarded their requests and stalked on hoping for an encounter with Britney Spears. The security didn’t put up with any of that and called sheriffs people who removed Miranda Tozier-Robbins from the property. The ex-American Idol turned Britney Spears stalker is now charged with trespassing and disorderly conduct. The mugshot of her awesomeness is above.

The biggest joke is that Britney Spears was not even at home when Miranda Tozier-Robbins went on her routine stalk around the house. What was she thinking she’d accomplish? Take a picture of her washroom and sell it to OK Magazine? Boring. She needs to get her logistics straightened out. You don’t go stalking Britney Spears unless Britney Spears is around. That is of course provided it wasn’t the security guy she wanted to stalk. In which case she can give herself a Borat toned: “GREAT SUCCESS!”

Ohio born rapper Charles Hamilton released a song titled Bud Dwyer and everyone is puzzled about who Bud Dwyer is. The song for those wo like rap is below. If you’d like to find out who Bud Dwyer – a person Charles Hamilton raps about…. read on:

To cut to the cheese – Bud Dwyer committed suicide live on national TV. The footage of his suicide is widely available and look rather graphic, especially since the cameraman who was recorded it zoomed in on dying Bud Dwyer and the video shows blood gushing out of his nostrils like a waterfall.

Bud Dwyer was a politician who was accused of bribery and was charged with agreeing to receive kickbacks. While Bud Dwyer repeatedly professed his innocence, he was found guilty and was facing up to 55 years in jail and a $300k fine. One day prior to his sentencing (January 22, 1987), Bud Dwyer called a press conference. The media gathered believing he was going to resign but instead he professed he was innocent again, pulled out a magnum revolver, put the barrel inside his mouth and pulled the trigger. All of this was recorded and live on TV. People of all ages, including little children watched this suicide live on TV.

Bud Dwyer loved his family and knew that if he resigned, he would go to jail and his family would be in debt. But since he never resigned, he remained government employee until he died (albeit by suicide). As such, his family got an insurance settlement that high ranking government employees with the type of pay check Bud Dwyer had would get. So instead of being $300k in debt, his family ended up with $1.2 Million settlement money. Bud Dwyer loved his family so much, he plotted this whole scheme and committed suicide live on TV in order to provide for his family. What a father.

If you are insane enough and would like to see the video of Bud Dwyer committing suicide, click on the link below, but be aware – it’s a graphic and upsetting footage many of you would find offensive:

Bud Dwyer Suicide Video

Don’t forget that the video below contains audio track of Charles Hamilton’s song titled Bud Dwyer. It’s not the Bud Dwyer death video. For that you must visit Best Gore.

Quentin Tarantino is the shit. He was a guest judge on American Idol in 2004 and Simon Cowell co. has invited his awesomeness to guest judge the competition one more time. Considering that’s he’s a rather extravagant movie director, it is hard to believe he would have the clue as to how people sing, but he actually does. As reepy as it sounds, Quentin Tarantino is the tits on American Idol and he actually makes sense.

Below is the video montage from Quentin Tarantino’s old judging back at season three of American Idol. Even though he actually sounds like a real douche, he’s at the same time retaining thew charm that’s so typical for him and that’s really awesome. I think Quentin Tarantino is a decent choice for guest judging of American Idol. Makes watching that otherwise boring crap worth while.

Quentin Tarantino Photo by Francois Mori, AP Photo