Beer Steak Bullshit

Scott Yanke was fired from his job as Fort Myers Beach town manager after councilors learned that he was married to a pornstar. Anabela Mota Janke whom Scott married last October is a seasoned vagina provider for adult movies and that’s bad in the books of small town Florida councilors. I’d fired his ass too. Imagine your name is Larry Kiker and you are a mayor of a small town in Florida. You have a collection of DVDs featuring Anabela Mota Janke and then you find out your dream girl got married to a guy you can have fired. You ain’t gonna put up with idea of a girl from your DVDs sucking on someone else’s cock in your backyard. If she’s not sucking on your manhood, at least get her husband fired, right?

Once the news was out, Fort Myers Beach town council met and voted 5-0 to get Scott Yanke fired “without cause”. Mayor Larry Kiker had this to say:

We did everything we could not to judge. It was not about him or her, it was about the town

You can tell Mayor Larry Kiker has seen every porn movie out there. Anabela Mota Janke is allegedly performing under a pornstar name Jazella Moore.

Bitsy is so tiny, she only weighs 1.5 pounds, stands 6.5 inches tall and measures 18 and 3/4 inches from tail to nose. Auriette Lindsey of Pensacola, Florida who’s the owner of Bitsy is trying to find out whether Bitsy could make it to the Guinness Book of World Records as the World’s Smallest Cat. People will never change. Exploiting poor animals for owner’s profit will always take priority.

Auriette Lindsey told WEAR-TV that she’s trying to get Bitsy in the Guinness Book of World Records as the World’s Smallest Cat, but their officials want to see the video and pictures of how the cat is measured to make sure they are no misrepresented figures. Auriette Lindsey insists that Bitsy was born of normal sized cat and the rest of the litter was normal sized as well.

Current holder of the World’s Smallest Cat lives in Louisiana and is heavier than Bitsy, but shorter. Guinness Book of World Records officials should declare who the World’s Smallest Cat in 6 weeks. Cute video with Bitsy is above.

Videos of men who have balls of steel are always cool to watch. This video is from the cockpit of a small plane that made an emergency landing on Havendale Boulevard in Florida. It’s fascinating how the men inside the cockpit were looking the death in the rectum yet they kept their cool, picked the best place when to attempt an emergency landing and landed with grace so that there were no life losses, no injuries, not even any property damage. And at the end they just parked their plane on the side like it was a car. Truly awesome.

The pilot of the plane was only 22 year old. His name is Kyle Davis – he was flying the plane along with his buddy Joe Surowiec who is seen in the video sitting next to him. The two took off from Winter Haven and were heading to the Lakeland Sun n’ Fun Fly-In when one of the plane engines failed. Realizing the urgency of situation, the men knew they had to attempt an emergency landing and so they did. The whole ordeal (even though it wasn’t one) was recorded on two cameras – one in the cockpit and another one somewhere behind the engine.

After engine had failed, Kyle Davis started looking for a place to land. They first considered a few fields that were in the area but decided it would be difficult to land there, so they chose to land on Havendale Boulevard while cars were casually passing by. This whole emergency landing was done with both men entirely calm and relaxed, like landing on the street was normal. Kyle Davis is a great pilot, obviously. Especially considering he’s only 22 year old. Check out the video below:

When you say “judge” and “stripper” in the same sentence, you know there’s something truly awful in the works. Especially for the judge. And this case from Tampa, Florida is no different. Judge Thomas Stringer must have had a thing for Asian hookers when he got himself involved with Japanese stripper Christy Yamanaka back in 1995. Thomas Stringer was married at that time too, but back then even strippers had more honor and you could trust them.

Fast forward to 2008 – Thomas Stringer is a seasoned judge and Christy Yamanaka… well, retired stripper. Nobody wanted to watch old hag with saggy skin to flash her labia at them. And unlike studying in law school where as Thomas Stringer invested into his future, Christy Yamanaka had no such long term investment into herself and whore can’t be a stripper forever.

Christy Yamanaka now claims that she had sex with the judge three times and that Thomas Stringer helped hide her assets from creditors so they wouldn’t take everything from her. As it turns out, strippers can make shit loads of money, which Christy Yamanaka did have, but she filed for bankruptcy in Las Vegas, Nevada nevertheless however was ordered by the court to pay her creditors about $315,000. Christy Yamanaka called Judge Thomas Stringer to help her hide the money she had from the creditors so they couldn’t get it.

Thomas Stringer referred her to her son who’s an attorney and together a bank account to which Christy Yamanaka had access, but it wasn’t under her name – hence out of creditor’s reach. Now Christy Yamanaka came out of the woodwork and asked judge Thomas Stringer for money or else she was gonna spill the beans about their secret relationship. He was supporting her financially before and helped her with that hiding money from creditors situation, but now she claims he owes her money for a Hawaiian property investment that she bought, but was under his name to hide it from the list of her assets.

Thomas Stringer resigned from his post as a judge in February, 2009.

Marie Moore Shooting Her Own Son

Remember when Ervin Antonio Lupoe killed all of his family and then himself after he got fired? Thinking that someone would turn a gun on a member of their own family is insane, but obviously it happens. As sad as it is, Ervin Antonio Lupoe at least had some form of reason for killing. 44 year old Marie Moore from Florida however… I don’t get it. Marie Moore was with her 20 year old son Mitchell Moore at a Casselberry Shooting Range last Sunday, when without warning and without any apparent reason, she turned the gun at her son and shot him dead. Marie then turned the gun on herself and pulled a trigger one more time.

Mitchell Moore was killed instantly. Marie Moore was taken to a Florida Hospital Altamonte where she was proclaimed dead later that day. According the statement released by Lt. Dennis Stewart from Casselberry police department, there was no argument or any other sign of a problem prior to shooting. Without any apparent reason, Marie Moore simply killed her own son and then herself.

There are obviously too many questions that may never be answered. Nobody understands why she would open fire killing her own son. There is no suicide note either. Perhaps mental disease or some weird voices in her head, maybe she heard the voice of The Holy Ghost who told her to shoot her own son. Who knows…

Marie Moore and her son Mitchell both lived in Altamonte Springs, Florida even though not on the same address. They got together as mother and son do for Sunday afternoon and went to spend quality family time at Florida’s Casselberry Shooting Range. The two were sharing the lane and according to people using adjacent lanes, they were getting along just fine. Then there was shooting and everyone started running berserk.

The police have reviewed surveillance tapes provided by the Casselberry Shooting Range which revealed graphic details of the shooting (screenshot from the video is above) – Marie Moore walked up to her son Mitchell from behind, pointed the revolver which was rented from the shooting range at the back of his head and fired a shot. She then put the revolver in her mouth and pulled the trigger one more time.

Check out the video of Marie Moore Shooting her own son but be warned of graphic nature of the video before you click.

I was starting to be proud of home girl Britney Spears who pulled herself together when daddy Spears took charge of her conservatorship. Not only has she pulled herself together, she even put a tour that looks like it’s gonna be a success when out of the blue came the My Pussy is Hanging Out news. The internet was all about Britney Spears’ pussy hanging out whole day and as it goes, there is a video of the slip now.

Britney Spears had a show in Tampa, Florida last night, the whole Circus performance went all smoothly, fireworks flashing, stage dancer twigging, then the song ends, Britney Spears goes off stage to change wardrobe, sound guy screws up and leaves her mic still on. The next thing – Britney Spears is heard by everyone at the hall say “My Pussy is Hanging Out”.

In today’s era of cell phone cameras, it is no surprise that there was a person recording the show. I think we will see classified ad on craigslist soon – pro sound guy, has experience working for Britney Spears, looking for job. Sure dude, you’re gonna get hired right away. Any more singers wanna let everyone know that their pussy is hanging out – hire this guy. He knows how to fuck you up.

OK, here comes the countdown till we have a plethora of remixes to Britney’s verbal slip. I can see David Letterman and Jimmy Kimmel putting together a skit. The world will revolve around the “My Pussy is Hanging Out” slip. Britney Spears could not have asked for any better publicity. Sales of her album Circus are going to reach unheard of level starting… now.

The My Pussy is Hanging Out Video by Britney Spears is below:

Ever heard of Fish Pedicure? Me neither. But then again, I’ve never even had regular pedicure done in my life. I don’t think I’d be able to afford it. My ogre feet stink and have huge nails, I’d be charged extra for that crap.

Fish Pedicure is a procedure in which you stick your foot, hand or any other body part in an aquarium full of fish and let them nibble on the dead skin, ridding you of that aging burden. As it could be expected, fish pedicure originated in Asia and has been making its way to North America, but it looks like you will still have to fly across the pond to get that type of treatment. The Florida Board of Cosmetology has banned Fish Pedicure and their example was followed other states. The ban cam before anyone got a chance to offer this service.

I kind of thought the ban of fish pedicure would have something to do with unethical treatment of animals – poor things would have to swim in the water where you put your stinking foot, never mind eating toxic sweat of your deformed feet. But I was wrong – the banning had precious nothing to do with poor fishes. Florida banned Fish Pedicure, because there isn’t a way to safely disinfect the bowl between uses. Hah, so sticking your foot in a fish tank poisoned by previous user’s foot would not be allowed, but poisoning fish with that foot would be OK. Logic! I feel for the fishes, they always get the shitty end of the stick.

The Kids, the rock music band with Johnny Depp as one of members (Johnny Depp plays guitar) did a live show at Club Cinema in Pompano Beach, Florida. It was a benefit concert in memory of Sheila Witkin who was a major supporter of rock music throughout South Florida.

Last time Johnny Depp played with The Kids was in January 2007 and it was in the same venue, in the same town in Florida and for the same purpose – Sheila Witkin Memorial fundraiser. Now, one and a half year later, Johnny Depp reunited with The Kids to perform two more concerts to help with the fundraiser.

Johnny Depp was a guest guitarist during recording of Oasis song Fade In-Out and had recorded a solo album in the past. So yeah, Johnny Depp does have some musical experience – an overall well rounded artist. Congrats. Even though I’ve never heard any music by The Kids…

More pictures of Johnny Depp and his band The Kids performing at Sheila Witkin Memorial in Florida below. You can comment on each picture separately.

The Kids and Johnny Depp Image Credit: Wireimage, Getty, Film Magic, Splash

Kite surfer in Fort Lauderdale, Florida thought he was gonna ride on the storm but Tropical Storm Fay owned his ass instead. And the ownage was caught on video camera. He must have been more desperate than me and thought kite surfing during tropical storm fay would get him laid, but instead he got laid in the hospital bed all beat up.

News video crew was at A1A and east Las Olas Boulevard on Fort Lauderdale beach when random dumbass of a kite surfer who was harnessed into his sail got picked up by powerful storm winds and slammed against the sandy beach like a bloody ragdoll. The winds then dragged his sorry ass about, lifting him up again and ass raping him in an ultimate slam against the nearby building. Daring Kite Surfer = owned and all of it is on the video.

Tropical Storm Fay: 1
Kite Surfer: 0

Carl Blonsky, the father of Hairspray star Nikki Blonsky remains in jail in Turks and Caicos after judge’s ruling who said he’s not leaving the bars until his trial which is scheduled for August 19, 2008. 53 year old Carl Blonsky is facing assault charges after airport brawl that had him, his daughter Nikki Blonsky and America’s Next Top Model participant Bianca Golden with her mom Elaine Golden fighting head over heels.

Carl Blonsky must have delivered decent beat down to Elaine Golden as she ended up getting an airlift to a hospital in Aventura, Florida. An assault charge with grievous bodily harm is a felony that’s punishable by up to five years behind bars – wow. Carl Blonsky better hope he doesn’t get his ass busted so bad he’ll stay in Turks and Caicos jail for so many years. I’m sure Bubba is looking forward to test driving a virgin ass.

Carl Blonsky has no previous criminal records. It’s unbelievable how a little catfight can land you in jail and could keep you there for years. Judge denied bail.