Beer Steak Bullshit

Angelina Jolie just gave birth to twins Knox Leon and Vivienne Marcheline last weekend but looks like Vanity Fair, Italy has had her for a photo session prior to that because they’re putting her mugshot on the cover and have a spread with her pictures in their upcoming issue. And we got the teaser pics.

As you surely know, Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt enjoy their life on French Riviera in a wonderful Chateau Miraval Estate and France is not all that far from Italy. It’s like going from New York to Miami. Italian issue of Vanity Fair found her way to Angelina Jolie and got her photographer but damn… she looks like a wax figurine to me. And those pics are heavily photoshopped. They are doctored, perfected… yet Angelina Jolie still looks like crap.

Unless pregnancy deforms people faces and makes them look all oily and shit – in which case I’ll shut my mug, but Angelina Jolie pics in Vanity Fair, Italy did not impress me at all. Fugly!

More pics after the break. Click on each for larger version and you can comment on each individually. What do you think? Would you hit it? Doesn’t she look waxy?

Another Miss USA fell on her ass during Miss Universe pageant making it second year in a row after Rachel Smith glamorously started a tradition. Crystle Stewart graced the floor of the Crown Convention Center at Diamond Bay Resort in Nha Trang, Vietnam with priceless ass touch down as billions of people watched the broadcast on their TVs.

Actually, this is good news for Miss USA Crystle Stewart. She really had no chance at winning and her name would go to oblivion anyway after Miss Universe, but by falling on her ass she’s sure to get her name passed around YouTube making her more discussed than Miss Venezuela – 22 year old Dayana Mendoza – an actual winner of Miss Universe. Dayana Mendoza is a former kidnap victim. How sad

The video of awesome Crystle Stewart falling on her ass at Miss Universe 2008 pageant is above, Watch the views go up

Today, Angelina Jolie gave birth to son Knox Leon and daughter Vivienne Marcheline. Voila, this event has long been awaited by the media and several false alarms were raised claiming the kids of Angie and Brad Pitt were born. None of it were true (none of the false alarms were reported by Beer Steak Bullshit Blog, cause we just rule like that) but it’s all official now.

Knox Leon and Vivienne Marcheline became official after mayor of Nice, France presented a birth certificate of Knox Leon’s to the media earlier today (Sunday) in front of Fondation Lenval hospital in Nice where Angelina Jolie gave birth to the twins on Saturday.

Birth Certificate of Knox Leon suggests that the boy was born on July 12, 2008 at 6:27 pm and according to People who got info from Dr. Michel Sussmann, Vivienne Marcheline would be the younger of the two, having been born few minutes after her older twin brother.

Mayor Christian Estrosi called Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt the most famous couple in the world. And why Knox Leon and Vivienne Marcheline? The boy got his first name Knox after the middle name of Brad Pitt’s father and Marcheline was the name of Angelina Jolie’s mother.

Congratulations to the most famous couple in the world

Miley Cyrus, everyone’s favorite underage slut is at it again, but this time around someone hacked into her email account and stole the juicy pictures to share with the world. The hacker from Digital Gangster claims he hacked into the email account of Miley Cyrus and stole shower pics 15 year old star of Hannah Montana emailed to Jonas Brothers member Nick Jonas. Does anybody listen to Jonas Brothers anyway???

So more sexually charged pictures of Miley Cyrus made its way to the vast information highway and are now seen by many as if we all cared. The slut does make it look like she’s stripping for Nick Jonas, but from pictures that are available there are no tits, no pussy, no brown ass hole. Do you think Miley Cyrus bleaches her asshole for Nick Jonas or just wiped it off with soap as part of her shower routine during which she takes stripping pictures?

These shower pics are apparently just the tip of the iceberg and the hacker who calls himself TrainReq claims he has some more, “worse pictures” but he plans to sell those, he ain’t giving them away. Hmmm, it’s not like he’s not gonna get his ass busted if he sells them. He should have just played it low profile, pass them on and be done with it. I’m sure hacking other people’s computers is a crime and he could be facing legal issues. And if there are some real naked pictures of Miley Cyrus, that could get even worse. TrainReq also claims that he read some very juicy emails Miley Cyrus sent to Nick Jonas, but he hasn’t saved those, just read them and now he’s acting like – oh man… I should have saved that shit. Yeah, you should have. One of those emails allegedly bears juicy details on the night Miley Cyrus and Nick Jonas fucked. Geee, now I seriously wander if he fucked her up the ass. Nothing like a little Miley Cyrus anal sex.

Dominic DiAngi is a 7 year old boy from suburban Frankfort who was supposed to have a memorable occasion by attending his first professional baseball game between the Chicago Cubs and Cincinnati Reds. But this first game could be his last. Dominic DiAngi was hit in the head by a foul ball that went off the bat of Chicago Cubs pitcher Ted Lilly. The foul ball hit left Dominic DiAngi unconscious with his skull fractured.

Dominic DiAngi was put into a medically induced coma because his body failed to breathe on its own. The 7 year old boy has regained consciousness in the meantime and the doctors say he may be released form hospital on Monday.

Such an unfortunate event. I’m not a big fan of baseball, but a boy was obviously looking forward to seeing the real game with his own eyes and instead he went into coma. Poor kid. But on the other hand, the name Dominic DiAngi has made it to many a newpaper so he’ll end up being a celebrity and that 6 year old girl who was wouldn’t play with him in the sand will now throw herself at him. How awesome is that. He can actually make approaches at her and if she screams bloody murder, he can blame it on him brain that got hit by foul ball. Had this happened to me, I wouldn’t still be a virgin. Unless you count that goat incident.

I wander what Ted Lilly feels like about near killing 7 year old boy. Maybe he’ll meet with Dominic DiAngi after he got better and sign a baseball cap for him. That’d be pimp.

This is nuts. Giant Alligator, a North Australian Crocodile snaps at a turtle with his jaws and crushes it with ease like it has no shell. It got a little bit crunchy, but the powerful jaws of an alligator had no issue destroying the turtle before eating it. Actually, he just swallowed it. They’ve got giant neck, they just sort of slide it through.

Seriously, don’t mess with an alligator. I wouldn’t want to get hose sharp teeth and powerful jaws to bite anywhere on me. It’d snap in an instant. Damn…

John Enos III is best known for his roles in Melrose Place, The Young And The Restless (he was Bobby Marsino) and some other worthless soap operas. As it turns out, John Enos III was doing sexy times with Madonna long before she hooked up with Carlos Leon.

Christopher Ciccone – Madonna’s brother shared some pretty personal details in his book Life With My Sister Madonna. Christopher Ciccone goes on to say that Madonna doubted Carlos Leon’s “Intelligence” before she had daughter Lourdes with him. Wander why she was with John Enos III then… Ahh well, the life of rich and famous.

Save the whale, damnit. Yidis Medina, ex-Colombian Congresswoman who became an ex after the 2006 elections bribery scandal in which she allegedly took bribes form Alvaro Uribe to give him a deciding vote has posed naked for the Colombian magazine SoHo.

Yidis Medina is actually in jail (Columbian version of house arrest). She was put in jail and these pictures were taken while she’s serving her time. That entire bribery scandal just got weirder.

During the bribery scandal, Alvaro Uribe wanted to change the constitution in order to get reelected. Yidis Medina accepted the bribe and voted in his favor – which she now (two years later) admitted to. Alvaro Uribe is of course not happy about it, because it would mean cancellation of his second term so he’s saying Yidis Medina is lying and wants a referendum for the people to vote. The weird bribery scandal got weirder and to make it a complete weirdness, Yidis Medina posed naked for a magazine. Viva la Colombia!

Jaslene Gonzalez, successful fashion model form Puerto Rico showed up at DJ Cassidy’s 27th Birthday Party half naked – sort of. I kind of dig the dress, cause I dig any dress that offers giant cleavage, but her face look atrocious and her bony rib cage takes off the popular zombie effect. I mean, it’s hot, but it’s not. Not on Jaslene Gonzalez me thinks.

What do you think? Would you hit it? Or do you fear you’d break yourself on her bones? How about the dress? Hot or not? How do you like Jaslene Gonzalez? What do you think of her? Should she have a hamburger and dress up less naked? Or are you impressed by her long legs?

Ingrid Casares has been having her name looked up after some juicy facts form her life, involving Madonna, the sister of Christopher Ciccone who reveals the secrets in his book Life With My Sister Madonna.

Christopher Ciccone says that Ingrid Casares, who is a night club owner in Miami, Florida met Madonna when she introduced her to Alex Rodriguez – baseball superstar. Ingrid Casares was allegedly taken aback by Madonna and the two may have become lesbian lovers. Ingrid Casares was reportedly Madonna’s Slave, sitting at Madonna’s feet and acting like she was her property. Well, if Madonna no longer master’s her, she can come sit by my feet. I’ll give her some spanking and have her drag behind me on her knees like a good, obedient slave. We can go to her nightclub in Miami afterwards.

Some reports say Ingrid Casares became famous in the 80’s after she’s introduced androgyny to the Miami club scene. She’s got something going about her. And she likes licking feet. Sounds like the perfect slave to me. I need a fucking slave, anyone knows where Ingrid Casares lives?