Beer Steak Bullshit

Paul Mason of Ipswitch, Suffolk, UK is officially the World’s Fattest Man. The title used to belong to Mexican Manuel Uribe, but while Manuel Uribe kept losing weight to get married, Paul Mason kept stuffing his face until his weight grew over that of Manuel Uribe. The doctors have the name for being a fat ass – “compulsive eating disorder”. I have my own name for it: “being a lazy and spoiled f$%k with too much money to waste”.

70 stone, super obese Brit Paul Mason requires care which costs British tax payers £100,000 a year. Stuffing one’s face is easy and excuses for it are at hand at any time. It takes a lot of self control and sacrifice to not eat each time there’s an opportunity, but unlike Paul Mason, I try. I’m about 40 pounds over what I would like to be but I could easily reach the level of Paul Mason and become the world’s fattest man myself if I decided that I was gonna be a whiny b!tch and blame it on a non-existent “compulsive eating disorder”.

Being lazy and spoiled is not an excuse. How do you think all those people who have not been blessed with well performing metabolism stay away from becoming the world’s fattest people? It’s not easy but we all try. Paul Mason doesn’t try because giving in is easier. We all have cravings and sometimes the cravings win. But Paul Mason has decided he was not going to fight them and this lead him to growing to the point of becoming the world’s fattest man.

Check out the TLC video with Paul Mason below:

Paul Mason photo by Fox News

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Seriously, what are the chances of two subs colliding in the Atlantic Ocean? If there were a grand total of two cars in the entire world and you are the owner of one of them. What are the chances of you colliding with that other car that can be just about anywhere in the world? Plus consider this – the movement of cars is two dimensional. You can only go forward and backwards, or left and right. You can’t go up and down (not talking about hills). Nuclear submarines of British and French armies managed to collide in Atlantic. The space within Atlantic, the three dimensional space that’s available for these nuclear subs is massive. And they still managed to collide. I’m just as short for explanation as you are. Do you think it has anything to do with Brits driving on the left

I’d be embarrassed out of my socks if I managed to collide with another nuclear sub that’s in the ocean when I am. That reminds me of the line in Finding Nemo – “What? The ocean’s not big enough for you?” Apparently it’s not big enough for French and British sub army. Tug of war does not quite work when you operate a sub, so they tried to batter each other. Their radar operator should really attend another training… Perhaps they also should include a lesson on distinguishing friendly subs from whales.

Here’s what happened – HMS Vanguard, the nuclear sub of British army and Le Triomphant, the nuclear sub of French army collided with each other within Atlantic Ocean and sustained heavy damage. As per First Sea Lord Admiral Sir Jonathon Band, no injuries were reported as both subs were floating about at low speeds. Both British and French sides confirmed that no nuclear security issues will rise from this collision. Considering each of the subs carries several nuclear war heads, if the collision was stronger, we’d have an under water nuclear explosion which would have insane implications. I can’t even think of what would happen to the sea life and to people living on shores of both sides of the Atlantic. They say tsunamis are result of deep sea earthquakes. If several dozen nuclear warheads exploded, we’d see a tsunami of epic proportions. Someone should start explaining how is it possible that submarines carrying weapons of mass destruction collided in the middle of Atlantic Ocean – world’s second largest body of water.

HMS VANGUARD Nuclear Sub Stats:
Launched in 1992
One of four British submarines carrying Trident nuclear missiles
Displacement (submerged) 16,000 tones, 150m (492ft) long
Can carry 48 nuclear warheads on a maximum of 16 missiles
Full crew is 145, including 14 officers
Submerged speed of 25 knots

LE TRIOMPHANT Nuclear Sub Stats:
Launched in 1994
One of four French ballistic missile nuclear-powered subs
Displacement (submerged) 14,000 tones, 138m (452ft) long
Can carry 16 ballistic missiles with nuclear warheads
Full crew is 110, including 15 officers
Submerged speed over 25 knots

Source: BBC News