Beer Steak Bullshit » Model

Georgia May Jagger, Mick Jagger’s Daughter Non Modeling Pictures

Happy — Thu, 13 May 2010 07:09:17 +0000

Georgia May Jagger is an underage daughter of rocker Mick Jagger and is a model who’s already been offered several well paying modeling jobs, including a half naked ad for Hudson Jeans (despite her being underage). As you can see from enclosed photos, Georgia May Jagger is not a model material. You can walk down your hood and find half a dozen better looking girls who would do a better job modeling, but they stand no chance in this oversaturated industry. So how does someone below average looking score top gigs? Simple – Georgia May Jagger is Mich Jagger and Jerry Hall’s daughter.

It’s a sad fact of modeling industry – agencies want to impress the celebrities so they give their offsprings gigs they clearly don’t deserve. Team of skilled photoshop artists takes care of fixing the model up and there you have it – successful advertising campaign involving a daughter of a famous person.

The pictures in a gallery below are of Georgia May Jagger without make-up, fancy lighting and skilled digital retouching. You be the judge if she’s a model material worthy of thousands of dollars for advertising campaigns.

Georgia May Jagger non modeling pictures by Fame

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Alexandra of America’s Next Top Model Falls and Gets Owned by Swinging Gong

Happy — Thu, 18 Mar 2010 16:13:00 +0000

21 year old Alexandra of Kerrville, Texas is very competitive and let things really get to her so she got double owned on a catwalk of America’s Next Top Model. It was brilliant! When a biotch who thinks too much of herself falls on her mug promenading her fat ass before the people, the feeling of happiness soars in the sky like angels. But when the same biotch collects herself and thinks she can still pull it off, but gets subsequently owned by a swinging gong, you know the world is instantly becoming a better place. The only thing that could make it better is having said Alexandra come on camera in tears and say that she’s very competitive. This video made my day. The pictures of that gay guy in yellow suit who does those gay movements with his hands and says things like “Wow” and “She’s Mad” only make it so much better.

The swinging gong told Alexandra straight up what everyone was thinking – she doesn’t belong on America’s Next Top Model and needs to get off that catwalk cause she’s too fat and ugly. When in doubt, listen to the gong.

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Alessandra Ambrosio Nowhere Near as Hot as Miranda Kerr

Happy — Fri, 30 Oct 2009 13:36:06 +0000

While Alessandra Ambrosio is a pretty hot piece of ass and looks smoking in the bikini for Victoria’s Secret, she didn’t blow me off my socks as much as Miranda Kerr yesterday. These are just some paparazzi pictures, not officially released Victoria Secret photos of Alessandra Ambrosio which may be the reason why.

Brazilian chicks never did it for me. They lack cuteness. It’s all mass sexism, no girl next door cuteness in Brazil. Victoria’s Secret clearly has some marketing plans behind their belt which would explain why there are so many leaked pictures of their top models in bikini lately. Must have something to do with upcoming Christmas season. Enjoy the pictures of Alessandra Ambrosio if you like Brazilian ass in the gallery below:

Alessandra Ambrosio Pictures by FamePictures.com

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Miranda Kerr Hot Body Rules in Bikini Pictures for Victorias Secret

Happy — Thu, 29 Oct 2009 08:24:05 +0000

I love chicks who have big gap between their thighs. Any woman who puts her legs together and you would still fit your fist between her thighs because her general vaginal area is that wide are the poop. Chicks like that have well developed pubic bone and make for excellent bumper when thrusting missionary style. Miranda Kerr is like that. While any hot vagina model who poses for Victorias Secret loses browney points for being a Victoria Secret model, it does pay for something being able to see the uber gap between her thighs.

Miranda Kerr’s hot body rules even though I don’t particularly care for her face. I’ve never noticed it until the last minute. That bikini body rules the shite though. Nice, tight little ass and flat stomach – how can you go wrong?

Gallery of pictures featuring Miranda Kerr and her hot body that rules in Victoria’s Secret bikini is below:

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Pink is NOT Old and Looks Hawt Modeling for Cary Hart

Happy — Sat, 10 Oct 2009 08:07:42 +0000

Everybody hated me for calling Pink old the other day so I’m setting the record straight – Pink is NOT old. She’s still sexy as all hell and tight like an 18 year old Vietnamese girl. She can probably also lift 14 kg glass balls with her vagina. Or maybe she has a penis skilfully tucked inside her ass and keeps it a secret that only her husband of two times knows about it.

Needless to say, these pictures are heavily photoshopped to perfection. Pink probably is not that tight anymore but was made look that way. Cary Hart, Pink’s husband deployed his wifey to model for his clothing line cause it’s basically worthless and having Pink wear it would be the only way for anyone to buy it.

Even though Pink is not old, she’s not 15 anymore either. Posing in pink underwear when you’re 30 is lame any way you spin it. Gallery of pictures with Pink wearing clothes by Cary Hart is below:

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Jasmine Fiore Missing – Awful Looking Playboy Blonde

Happy — Tue, 18 Aug 2009 16:36:11 +0000

This awful looking blond in the picture is Jasmine Fiore. 28 year old Jasmine Fiore is a bikini model and Playboy representative. Why am I not surprised that when I see a fake blonde with atrocious fake boobs and beastly make-up with chola eyebrows, it’s somehow associated with Playboy. Hugh Hefner has the worst taste in women and he imposes it on unsavvy men through his outdated magazine. Hef needs to realize that there’s only one creature worthy of coveted title “model” – Squirrel the Magnificent. Nobody can pose those moobs like he can, nevermind the best impersonation of Nosferatu since Max Schreck.

However, despite her horrendous looks, I’m not gonna focus on that too much as poor Jasmine Fiore may be going through some hardship. Lisa Lepore, mother of Jasmine Fiore reported to the police that her daughter was last seen on Friday, August 14, 2009 and has not been heard from since.

Jasmine Fiore, whose name was Jasmine Kinkaid until her recent move to Los Angeles, moved to California from Las Vegas to start a personal training business there. She lived in the 800 block of Edinburgh Avenue, close to Melrose Avenue and according to her mom, she was not planning to go anywhere. And then bam – missing. Lisa Lepore says it’s not typical of her daughter to vanish without saying where she’s going so she’s rightfully freaked out.

If you see said Jasmine Fiore, don’t freak out. Collect yourself and contact LAPD about her whereabouts. I know she may scare the living poop out of you, but she’s just a harmless blonde with nasty tits is all.

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Anne Vyalitsyna – From Bikini Modeling for SI to Dating Leonardo DiCaprio

Happy — Mon, 10 Aug 2009 16:54:33 +0000

Russian model Anne Vyalitsyna is the latest ho to score prestigious Beer Steak award for being a successful gold digger of the week. Anne Vyalitsyna scored herself a date with Leonardo DiCaprio and her ratings immediately sky rocketed. While she previously posed in bikini for Sports Illustrated, the name of Anne Vyalitsyna means very little to most people and look what happened overnight – now she’s talked about across the blogosphere. If a chance to dig some gold comes, grab at it, sit on it and don’t let it pull out. Make sure sperm stays in your vagina. That’s the key to successful gold digging. It’s like moving it up to second base.

Leonardo di Caprio has recently broken up with another bikini model – Bar Refaeli. Having her replaced with Anne Vyalitsyna shows lack of imagination on behalf of Leonardo DiCaprio but hey… she’s Russian. Maybe she gives hell of a good head. Leonardo DiCaprio and Anne Vyalitsyna have been spending time together on Spanish island of Ibiza but Leo’s rep would not confirm that the two are an item. Yet. I’m not too fond of Anne Vyalitsyna. If you look up SI bikini photos, there are some sideboob pics there that make her boobs look sagged the same way Lindsay Lohan has.

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Nicole Lamarche – Swimsuit Model Turned Reverend

Happy — Tue, 10 Mar 2009 15:42:23 +0000

Nicole Lamarche is a swimsuit model and a Miss San Francisco 2003 who left the career of being pretty and became the reverend of Cotuit Federated Church. Now I know there is something incredibly attractive about women who give their body and soul to God – that’s why nun porn has always done very well within adult industry and continues to be a popular niche and the story of Nicole Lamarche doesn’t make it any better. Especially since she was previously promenading herself on the stage wearing only bikini and now she’s a reverend.

Nicole Lamarche is now 30 year old, but as attractive as ever. A cougar you might say. As former swimsuit model, she’s tall and slender, with long hair and gorgeous, beaming smile. 2 years ago, when she became minister of Cotuit Federated Church, parishioners of Cape Cod village were not impressed by having a reverend with the modeling past. If I was a Cape Cod village resident, I’d insist our Reverend Nicole Lamarche serves masses wearing a bikini. I’d start attending church again. I’d even donate to church. Got to make sure Nicole Lamarche can afford more swimsuits to guide her lost sheep.

Nicole Lamarche attended Miss pageants with purpose of monetizing on her good looks (afterall, all models and wannabe Miss contestants do it for that very reason). She won Miss Greater Bay Area, followed up to win Miss San Francisco and moved on to become Miss California all in 2003. During that time, she was already enrolled in the seminary school. Being Miss California, she went to represent her state on Miss America, which landed her $24,000 in prize money and things were looking good. Her school got more traffic than any other time in history.

Things are good for Reverend Nicole Lamarche. Her parishioners got used to having a pastor who posed for millions of people in the bikini, she got married to Jeremy Nickel and had a wonderful honeymoon in Morocco. She’s good looking and happy, Could life get any better?

Photo of Rev Nicole Lamarche with the parishioners by John Bohn (Globe).

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Charlie Axel Woods – Tiger Woods Baby Son

Happy — Mon, 09 Feb 2009 16:43:25 +0000

Golfing sensation Tiger Woods has a son. Charlie Axel Woods was born on February 8, 2009 and both Tiger Woods and his gorgeous wife Elin Nordegren are delighted. Charlie Axel Woods is Tiger’s first son and a second baby, his daughter Sam Alexis Woods is now 19 months old.

The news of Tiger Woods and Elin Nordegren expecting second baby has been around for a while and here he is. I’m sure we’ll have first pictures of Charlie Axel Woods soon. If he inherited golf skills of his father, then unsurpassed reign of The Woods as best golfers of all time will continue for another generation.

Tiger Woods is arguably the best golf player of all time and I doubt anyone could suggest otherwise. He met his wife Elin Nordegren in 2001. Elin was a Swedish model at the time and got introduced to Tiger Woods by his buddy, Swedish golfer Jesper Parnevik for whom Elin Nordegren worked as an au pair (yeah, that’s European for baby sitter). Tiger and Elin immediately clicked, got married had first child and now there’s Charlie Axel Woods – another baby and a son of the best golfer. What a happy family.

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Karolina Kurkova Belly Button FAIL (pics)

Happy — Thu, 20 Nov 2008 20:07:42 +0000

It’s official – Karolina Kurkova has NO belly button. That’s one complete belly button FAIL. Karolina Kurkova is a popular Victoria’s Secret model and VS reps admitted that she’s got no belly button so their digital artists fix up her skin and give her something that resembles belly button. FAIL!

That’s more FAIL at one spot than I can handle. Isn’t Victoria’s Secret a lot about lingerie and shit – aka stuff that requires models to show their navel? Are Victoria’s Secret people so short of models they must use a model without belly button and hire photoshop artists to make her have one. Isn’t there a plethora of beautiful women out there who have complete bodies suitable for bikini modeling without the need for digital belly button? Why Karolina Kurkova? What’s so special about her? I mean I’d stick my horny finger in her pie hole any day, but there are so many “complete” models out there who not only look hotter than Karolina Kurkova, they also have… well – a fucking belly button. Karolina Kurkova has got none and I only hope her pussy is not sealed the same way either. That would suck. Guy can always fuck her in the ass, but damn… piece of shin where you expect a cavity? Victoria’s Secret – why?

Pic below is priceless. Other Victoria’s Secret model is actually staring at Karolina Kurkova’s Belly Button and has no fucking idea what the heck that shit’s all about. Photoshoppers did some pathetic job fixing it so to a regular masturbating manwhore like me it’d look normal upon first glance, but it’s not. How awesome – Karolina Kurkova Belly Button FAIL!

Plus if you look at the pic on top – Karolina Kurkova has got no labia either. There’s just a gross overused camel toe. No labia. That woman is a big FAIL. I’d still finger that shit.

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Beer Steak Bullshit » Model

Georgia May Jagger, Mick Jagger’s Daughter Non Modeling Pictures

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Alexandra of America’s Next Top Model Falls and Gets Owned by Swinging Gong

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Alessandra Ambrosio Nowhere Near as Hot as Miranda Kerr

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Miranda Kerr Hot Body Rules in Bikini Pictures for Victorias Secret

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Pink is NOT Old and Looks Hawt Modeling for Cary Hart

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Jasmine Fiore Missing – Awful Looking Playboy Blonde

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Anne Vyalitsyna – From Bikini Modeling for SI to Dating Leonardo DiCaprio

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Nicole Lamarche – Swimsuit Model Turned Reverend

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Charlie Axel Woods – Tiger Woods Baby Son

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Karolina Kurkova Belly Button FAIL (pics)

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