Beer Steak Bullshit

WARNING – if you live within North America, don’t watch the video. You will find it offensive. You’ll probably end up suing somebody. Oh, the outrage! Naked male bums on national TV. How dare they in Sweden? Off with their heads! Seriously…

All right. Remember the Janet Jackson Wardrobe Malfunction during Super Bowl half time break in 2004? Yeah, Justin Timberlake grabbed at Janet Jackson’s dress right over her tit and yanked ripping the tit cover off, exposing the boob which had nipple and areola covered with some ornament. It cause so much controversy morons at high places would not shut their stupid mugs about it for half a decade now. The way real time broadcasting in North America works had to be reprogrammed so we don’t expose innocent, vulnerable… someone (I don’t even know who) to the dangers of seeing half naked sagged boob. What ridiculousness.

The above is in North America, though. In Europe, they’re not as ass tight and everything works fine. The Swedish rendition of Sweden’s Got Talent featured a quartet of twinks whose act was a dance. Only they were dancing naked. Yep, four naked twinks on national TV in Sweden performing their dance. Granted, their moves were done in such way so as to cover their private parts, however they were wearing no clothes and their asses were in clear view of spectators and cameras at all times.

Imagine this would happen in North America. Janet Jackson would be put to shame with her lame attempt at destroying our purity. The whole shit country would get sued, heads would be falling, businesses would be shutting down, religious prudes would start nationwide sessions to cleanse the sheep off the sin – the entire continent would explode.

Now look what they do in Sweden – judges give performers standing ovations, audience shocked, but loving it – not because they see nudity, but because they see four twinks with balls the size of a Keiko whale. Even though these twinks weren’t that greatly rehearsed, they were given props by everyone for entertaining the crowd and bringing something new on the stage of Sweden’s Got Talent. Sweet old Europe!

Do you file this under “wardrobe mulfunction” too? Or does it only count when a nipple is exposed? Pissing ones pants in public definitely counts as some of the most humiliating things that can happen to a man. And it looks like it happened to Liam Neeson yesterday. He seems to be standing there calmly which is rather confusing, becuase you’d expect a man who just pissed himself to be at least somewhat confused and embarassed, so I tend to think he may have just spilled a drink on his pants (after all, he’s Irish). Whether that happened to be the case, I seriously admire his aiming. If he actually spilled last pint of guinness on his crotch, he surely hit the right spot to make it look like he pissed himself. What do you think? Did Liam Neeson piss his pants or is this just a harmless liquid spillige that landed at the wrong spot?

Liam Neeson is an actor best known for his role in Steven Spielberg’s Shindler’s List and he’s also the magical voice of Aslan, the lion leader of Narnians in The Chronicles of Narnia. Got to love them peeps in Ireland. They remain cool even if they piss their pants.