Beer Steak Bullshit

Actually, I don’t know for sure if they’re stoned out of their vaginas, but look at the pic.. That’s Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattison, the stars from a big ass chick flick movie Twilight during movies UK Premiere. Don’t they look like they’ve just spent the evening puffing on a doobie and rubbing vaginas together? I’m sure Robert Pattison has a vagina. That being said, I wouldn’t be surprised if Kristen Stewart had a penis. Kristen looks pretty hot stoned though.

Or maybe it’s my pot that clouds my sight so I see all hot bitches as stoned. Too many Cuban cigars I had in Cuba, the smoke still keeps me afloat. And I did go to see Twilight. I actually liked it. Even though I feel that if there is one more chick flick that I like, I should grow a vagina. Maybe Robert Pattison can lend me his. Unless Kristen Stewart rubbed the crap out of it so it’s all worn and overused.

Brooke Smith, an actress who portrayed Dr. Erica Hahn on Grey’s Anatomy may be taken off the show. ABC executives say they didn’t like Brooke Smith’s character and wanted Grey’s Anatomy without her. I’m not sure if it’s her lesbian nature that they didn’t like (or not enough lesbianism) but obviously someone at ABC’s got the stick up their ass.

I find Brooke Smith a great actress and think Grey’s Anatomy will lack without her, but the show must go on. There’s nothing unusual about characters coming and going. That’s the nature of the beast. Brooke seems talented and ready to rub vagina’s at the right places. She’s gonna fill herself in soon. She’s real, many women can relate to her. I can’t. I have a dick. I’d cuddle with her lesbian vagina though.

The video below has Brooke Smith as Dr. Hahn after sexual awakening. It’s weird and funny at the same time. When she talks about green blobs turning to leaves and says “you are glasses” I just wish I could shove it right up her ass. She’ll be missed

An American Carol is a comedy that ridicules the man who makes films to ridicule others - Michael Moore. I like most of Michael Moore’s movies - as a matter of fact I like all of Michael Moore’s movies except from one - Slacker Uprising. Yes, that’s the latest movie by Michael Moore and while I approve of him making fun of politicians, as soon as he starts telling people who to vote for, he’s pretty much lost it right there. Now here’s a strike back using his own weapons - An American Carol makes fun of him.

Seeing how Barack Obama worshippers are unable to like anything that makes fun of fellow Barack Obama worshippers, I don’t expect we’ll see any staggering reviews of An American Carol. I think Obama worshippers and other blind-folded liberals will get rather upset. But who cares… I myself haven’t seen it yet, but judging from the trailer below, it’s gonna be a fun ride. Not for the Democrats, they are forever doomed to not understand the fun, but they’ve already shown the world they don’t think rationally. And no - before you ask. I’m not a republican. I don’t even live in America.

An American Carol is a movie by David Zucker. It’s based on the idea of A Christmas Carol, except that Scrooge is Michael Moore and instead of lacking human feelings, the main character lacks appreciation for his country.

An American Carol opens for public screening today. Yes, screening for critics was skipped - maybe in order to avoid deliberate bad reviews from ever so revengeful Liberals. Kevin Farley looks great as Michael Moore. I’m also guessing the movie will not be funny to those who are not into politics. Since it makes fun of political situation and Liberal filmmakers, not being too big into politics may mean you won’t enjoy this political movie satire. Otherwise, go see An American Carol. Looks like a fine shit to watch.

I found this viral video on a website with long URL that contains all of the words - Something Bad is Going to Happen Here - somethingbadisgoingtohappenhere.com.

It’s pretty intense, well executed and rather brow rising. Even though I hate to spoil it for everyone with a few factsproving that it’s fake. So if you’re easily offended, don’t read on.

In general, when a guy puts his face on what appears to be red hot stove element, his hair never catches fire nor it melts as result of extreme heat. The effect of smoke underneath the element as well as burned flesh and skin are impressive though. Awesome viral video - Something Bad is Going to Happen Here!

Catch That Kid is an English adaptation of successful Danish movie Klatretøsen. It’s a pretty, family friendly movie that’s along the lines of Robert Rodriguez’ Spy Kids, except that the kids are not spies, the kids are bank robbers.

Catch That Kid features trio of kids - Maddy, Austin and Gus who are on a mission to steal $250 000 from a bank in order to pay for the operation of Maddy’s father who’s paralyzed from neck down after he fell mountain climbing.

Catch That Kid is a very simple movie, so simple you wonder how it made its way to be a feature, but it’s one of those things you can watch when you don’t want to think too hard and just want to release the stress of the day. If you’ve had enough fanboy blabber regarding The Dark Knight, check out Catch That Kid and have yourself taken aback for day, to the time when you were a kid. Now go and Catch That Kid.

Marcia Nasatir and Lorenzo Semple Jr. aka Reel Geezers shared their (valid) opinions about The Dark Knight, the most overhyped movie of all time. They’re definitely right about everything they say, and they haven’t even covered all aspects of why The Dark Knight Sucked.

Reel Geezers loved the performance of Heath Ledger, but that’s about the only worthy part of The Dark Knight. And I have to agree. Take away The Joker and what you have left is a “joke” of a movie. Yes, The Dark Knight broke boxoffice records, but tht doesn’t necessarily mean it was a good movie.

It all boiled down to one thing which I completely agree with. Reel Geezers believe that the success of The Dark Knight was due to death of Heath Ledger and they’re right. RIP Heath

First official movie trailer for upcoming sixth installation of the Harry Potter franchise - Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince has been released today.

The trailer is kind of different. It sets weird mood. Probably the whole movie will be much darker than the previous ones. But it’s the first official trailer, there will be other ones. Voldemort is pretty scary, though. The trailer shows him as kid - he was Tom Riddle before he became Lord Voldemort. Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince will be an awesome movie, can’t wait to see it.

Tom Riddle, the 11 year old version of Lord Voldemort is played by 10 year old Hero Fiennes-Tiffin who’s a real life nephew of Ralph Fiennes, the guy who plays Voldemort.

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince is directed by David Yates and will be in the theater near you in November.

The first official movie trailer release is below:

I’m a big fan of Saw movies and have seen them all so far. Jigsaw is awesome. Above is the official poster for new installment of the Saw franchise - Saw V, and below is Saw V first official teaser trailer and it looks bad ass.

Saw 5 release date is set for Friday before Halloween this year. All previous movies from the series were released before Halloween and this latest one continues with the tradition. There is a major change compared to previous installments - Saw V will not be Darren Lynn Bousman, who directed all previous Saw movies, but instead by David Hackl, who was part of the production team for Saw II, Saw III and Saw IV.

There haven’t been any spoilers released so I can’t share much, but we have the trailer and it looks good. I’m definitely going to see this goodness. I love movies that are this intense. Gah…

The Dark Knight set new Box Office Records. The movie made so much money on its opening night, that if you go by the Warner Bros villa tonight, you’ll see them eating Russian caviar served on plates made of $100 bills. They’ve probably ordered wallpaper company to cover their walls with the $100 bills cause banks have no where to store all this money anymore.

The Dark Knight, aka Batman 3 cashed in an estimated $66.4 million on it’s opening night on Friday. That counts as te best opening day in history of movie making. Box office records broken, Dark Knight takes it all. And consider that the sales are just gonna go so much higher over the weekend. Many people don’t want to go see a movie on an opening night, cause there’s too much insanity involved and will go either on Saturday or on Sunday.

Previous installment of the Batman movie - Batman begins cashed in $15 million on its opening day.

Anyway, you have all probably known that long time ago. The Dark Knight was gonna set the all-time box office record. No one thought otherwise. I knew that too and I knew I was not gonna go see it. I am gonna see Batman3, but just not yet. I want to enjoy Joker kicking some ass, not be pissed at hoards of teenagers spoiling my fun in the theater. So this post is pretty much just a redundant reminder that as anticipated, Te Dark Knight owned. The Dark Knights owns Box Office Records and is likely going to continue at this trend for the rest of the weekend. Blah Blah…

I already saw my best movie of the year anyway - Wall-E. I know I will love The Dark Knight, but for me, it will never beat Wall-E. The cuteness and smoothness of the Pixar movie is second to none. Let me know what you though of The Dark Knight. I know you went to see it, you goofs

Below is the gallery of pics from The Dark Knight with lots of great shots of Heath Ledger as The Joker. You can comment on each picture individually. Looking forward to reading your thoughts.

The Secret Life of the American Teenager episode 2 was shown the other night and has proven to be just as diabolically awful as the first one. But that’s why we like it. “You see like there’s this girl named Amy who’s suuuch a band geek…” Well there is but that’s the twist, Amy is a band geek but is actually the naughty girl that got pregnant, whilst hot wants to wait until she’s married.

Despite this twist “The Secret Life of the American Teenager” is still full of over played stereotypes and at times painful acting, but judging by statistics the ABC family show seems to be a hit with its audience already and the tackling of teenage emotional issues still seems a viable concept.

The “The Secret Life of the American Teenager” plot centers around six teenagers as they face the hardest thing in life - GROWING UP. There’s the bad boy Ricky, getting it on with the bad girl Majorette Adrian. The nice guy Ricky Richardson (why not just call him Timmy O’Tool) who doesn’t know Amy is pregnant with his child (poor him, he should have used a condom). And the two best friends who obviously know what’s right for them both. Did I mention one is a hot prissy cheerleader?

The Secret Life of the American Teenager airs every Tuesday at 8pm on ABC.

The trailer for The Secret Life of the American Teenager is below: